Renee and I spent three decades as professionals and parents, and from those, we have many beautiful memories that we’ll always treasure. We got married and had children very early in our twenties, and we always said that we’d have our “newlywed” years once the girls became adults. Well, we’re there now, and it’s time for something new.
In our youth, we probably envisioned those days as travel abroad or Broadway tickets, jet setting across the country with a carefree attitude only gained by years of hard work and dedication. So often in life, and this is very true for us, there’s a difference between what you imagine is going to be, and what actually transpires. For us, incongruent expectations and realities have happened on numerous occasions. In fact, our 25th wedding anniversary dinner is a good example.
For several months, we’d planned to celebrate at one of our favorite swanky places in Nashville. But Mother Nature intervened, and the snow and ice she presented us as an anniversary present dictated instead that we’d be driving our four-wheel-drive jeep to the little Indian place close to our house in Smyrna. As it turns out, we had a wonderful dinner, chatting with the owners and other guests, and reminiscing on our 25 years together. A phrase emanated from that dinner that I’ve thought of often since: It’s not what I imagined, but it’s better than I could’ve expected. Once again, that phrase rings true, as we’ll spend our next phase balancing our work lives in Smyrna and the renovation of the 130-year-old house that we’ve inherited from my parents, the house in which I grew up.
My Great-Grandfather WD Aydelott built the house around 1890 as a 1.5 story “dog trot.” From then until 1947, it served as a temporary abode for tenant farmers working on the family farm, for newlywed couples just beginning their lives, and even as a barn. But in 1947, my parents LT and Winnie moved there and stayed. The old house has been through many changes, with significant renovations around 1900, the early 1950s, the mid-1970s, and now in 2020.
Here’s the thing: It’s not just the house that is getting renovated. Renee and I, both professionals with excellent communication skills and the ability to navigate Google Docs and Office 365, are now going to learn skills equal to this task. Will we make mistakes? Yes. (In fact, just a few days ago, I created an unintentional indoor water feature.) Will it be frustrating? Yes. Will Renee and I have to lean on each other more than ever? Yes. Will we have to show vulnerability and ask for help? Yes. (My oldest brother Paul saved the day with the aforementioned plumbing problem.) But if we approach this with vision, hard work, growth mindset, and support each other as we have so far in our lives, we will have done something extraordinary.
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